I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize
