If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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