There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
So many bounce houses so little time
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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