I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
Pants 0. Shit 1.
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
Randomize
