butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
