Joe is yelling at the trees again.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize