he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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