"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize
