Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Randomize
