White coat. Heels.
People with herpes should wear stickers.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Randomize