Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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