Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
