Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
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