did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
Randomize
