My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
Randomize
