I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
Randomize
