Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Randomize
