your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
Randomize
