It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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