is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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