i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Randomize
