she was so not down for the gang bang
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
Randomize
