be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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