I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Randomize