No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
The struggles of a small town man whore
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
Randomize
