you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
Fuck appropriateness.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
Randomize
