and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
Randomize
