I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
