We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize
