My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
I deserve to be covered in dicks
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
Randomize
