sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize