Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
I just found a bag of teeth...
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
