Bisexual people are plain selfish.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
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