It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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