But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
