You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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