Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize