That's when you crack a 10am beer
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
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