If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Randomize
