remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
