what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
ttyl tear gas
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
