my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
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