he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
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