Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
handjob tips. give me some.
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize