I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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