I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
