I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Randomize
