Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
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