I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Randomize
