Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Randomize