The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Randomize
